“We live in a modern society”. I have been hearing this phrase from many Syrians, particularly in the city of Tartus where I live, considered by some to be one of the most liberal of Syrian cities.

“That same phrase comes to mind as I hear someone catcalling me in the streets. I turn around and see a face I’ve never seen before, throwing me a kiss and walking away. I think that every girl experiencing this, feels two things; one side tells you to lash out, the other to walk away peacefully – the latter often happens, and the girl walks away avoiding an altercation.

We are getting used to this reality in markets, universities, and streets, as though it is some witty and kind compliment. They call you the “moon, someone who lights up the space, and even call on the earth beneath your feet to keep you safe.” Some of them are religious, “Peace and Blessings Upon the Prophet”, they say as you walk by. If you were drinking coffee or eating a sandwich, inevitably a stranger tells you the Arabic equivalent of Bon Appétit.

Another form of interaction involves vulgar words about the female organs. You hear them from teenage boys, young adults, a senior, and men on the streets who are supposedly meant to protect women under such circumstances, not the opposite! When I was in middle school, there was a girl named Zeina. She catcalled a young man in the schoolyard once, and people showed her no mercy. The echoes of these talks haunt her to this day after all these years. At the same time, the boys harassed girls non-stop, and I do not recall any of them being the talk of the town like Zeina was.

The same fingers pointing at Zeina were lowered in submission for the boys. Are we not tired of surrendering ourselves to these behaviors?!